Life Defenders

Written by Susana Khai  I remember that for the last couple of weeks, something felt different. My body felt bloated and my moods did too. I had been pregnant before, so I knew that feeling and I got suspicious. As I walked out of the bathroom with my pregnancy test, I just knew. I had been battling a heroin addiction for about 2 years. The fact that I was afraid to bring another child into this world was an understatement. I had done this before when I was 14 when I had a beautiful little girl that I gave up for adoption. I had my son Gage at 16. This would be the third child that I brought into this world under not so favorable circumstances. Now my current situation felt even more bleak, I’m  19 , but I still haven’t grown much emotionally or mentally. You see, addiction didn’t allow me to grow. In fact, I’m sure its goal was to destroy me and halt growth at any cost. I felt like I had no idea what I was going to do. I was scared. My boyfriend’s family at the time

Written By Marda Gosnell I suffered 3 miscarriages all within a year span . I got pregnant 3 times back to back mainly because I was trying to replace a hole in my soul from my first loss.  I lost my first child September 19th/ 2017, at 11 weeks and it killed me.  I have endometriosis and a biocornuate uterus, so I already knew my chances of getting pregnant were lower. The doctors told me at 15 that I’d probably hit menopause in my 30s, so getting pregnant was amazing to me. Even though I was only 18,  I felt ready.  I am an only child, but I have worked with children since  I was 12yrs old and I am generally happiest around kids. Being a live in nanny was my best and favorite job.  It was a very stressful time for me, though.  My late baby’s daddy was constantly cheating on me, but I fooled myself into thinking it was my fault. I ended by getting pregnant again and experienced a missed miscarriage. My baby passed at 11 weeks, but I didn’t find out until my 13 w